I am a big ole sleepyhead today. Grey day. Out late last night. Not up very early this morning. Aching bones.

Last night we went and saw Norbit at the theatre, the movie that cost Eddie Murphy the Oscar. Not a shining moment even on the Eddie Murphy comedic scale of things. Same concept as The Nutty Professor with Murphy playing multiple roles but not done nearly as well. Martin Lawrence’s Big Momma’s House is more fun. Still, it was a free night out. Movie tickets expire tomorrow. Not sure whether we’ll be going out to see something tonight or not. Ironically, Hog Wild, with William H. Macey that I REALLY want to see, opens here on Friday.

Today I spent a couple of hours with the cover subject of the next bnm. He dropped by and we had a lovely long chat. Lots of material for a story! LOTS! Should be a good one too. Tomorrow night I am invited to a murder mystery night with the Purple Hat Ladies Tea Society. I’ve no idea what it’s all about, but it’s bound to be interesting, that is for sure.

I made soy burgers for lunch today. Yummy! And I really mean that. I have gone back to the meat, but I have to say beef is not coming back easy. I’m a bit grossed out by real hamburger still. No urge to eat steak or roast etc. I truly prefer the veggie patties for burgers, though my mom thinks they’re like eating cardboard. Really, they’re not. Some of them are quite good.

I went into my files and found Katt’s Lives, third person, before I started expanding the sections into first person. I’ve written two parts, Gun Play and Cuttings, and I’m going to start tossing out some more. There are 11 parts in the original. Ten near misses and a new lease on life. Perhaps she should only have 9 lives after all. I’m uncertain. I have two copies, one with someone else’s notes (Judy? Elizabeth? Susan?) and one with my notes taken from the feedback in a workshop session in the basement of the Mount A library that one time that we gathered after my move. We’re supposed to start workshopping again real soon. For real. I think I need that kind of intensity. A weekly thing to propel me forward. Maybe? Hell, it can’t hurt. I feel like I haven’t written anything new in years, which is of course completely untrue. I write here all the time. Some of it is good. Both of Katt’s stories unfolded in the loft in Sackville. I’ve been writing. I haven’t been pursuing publishing opportunities though. I haven’t been editing my own stuff or rewriting. I haven’t been seeking sources of funding for creative writing projects. I haven’t been maintaining a creative mindspace. But acknowledging my short-comings must surely be part of the battle to overcoming the obstacles.

Mood: dozy
Drinking: nothing, tho a spot of water would be grand
Listening To: rumble of tv from next door
Hair: pushed back in a bandanna

Into You

Blisters on my heels from yesterday’s trek. Calves sore this morning. Yay!

Yesterday afternoon dissolved into a ball of frustration. My mother had purchased me a box spring at the Salvation Army on Saturday, so I knew they would be calling to let me know they were coming by to deliver. She had some problems at the store with people not seeming to know how to ring up the sale, where to put the order, etc. But no matter, the phone rang yesterday afternoon and it was the store. They’d made a mistake, they said. The queen they had in stock was actually a mattress, not a box spring, so they didn’t have any of their new ones on hand, but they had one from Lounsbury’s with the plastic still on it. Did I want that instead? And a credit for $20 worth or merchandise?

Well, it’s only the boxspring, not the mattress, and it still has the plastic on it, and I could maybe get an end table with the $20 credit . . . so I say sure, why not, bring it over. They arrive. They drop the beast in the hall and scatter quicker than I can say Thanks, leaving me to lug the thing all by myself into the bedroom. This proves to be a bit of a struggle, getting the plastic off, lugging, and the thing is not in the kind of great shape that I imagined a box spring in its original plastic should be and it smells so musty I’m gagging. But still I’m optimistic, I’ll Febreze the crap out of it. It’ll be good enough. It’s only a box spring, not a mattress.

I get it drug into the bedroom, drop it onto the frame, and it’s only then that I notice what might have been readily apparent to anyone with any bed common sense who hadn’t been knocked semi-unconscious by the musty smell . . . it’s only a double!! I need a queen. Aye-yi-yi!

So I drag it all the way back into the hall, call the store, go through five people to get to the one I need, explain the situation . . . and she says she has to call me back. About then I start to boil over. She finally calls back. They’ll have to order a new one. Take 10 days. Do I want one? I say I have to check with Mom, as she’s the one making the purchase. But I’m done. I’d sooner sleep on the floor for the rest of my days as have to deal with those dingbats again.

So I febreezed my room to get rid of the musty smell, went to the Petro and bought bread and eggs so I might have a soy burger for supper and buckwheat pancakes today. And then I made a monster pot of chili. I mean MONSTER SIZED!! It’s huge. I have chili for everyday this week and chili in the freezer to the end of days. This is frugal living. I’m into my third week here, and I can’t afford groceries. I don’t know when I’ll be able to afford groceries. It could be awhile. I wasn’t able to pay only part of the minimum on my credit card and some on the phone bill. I haven’t got the hydro bill yet. That may be scary. But I have the rent covered. That’s the main thing. Everything else I can shuffle around for awhile until I get this figured out.

I had hoped for an income tax refund. Had planned on it actually, but it’s not going to happen. I’ll consider myself lucky if I don’t have to pay in. I’m trying not to get discouraged. I’m trying not to worry. But this is the poorest I’ve been ever, well not ever, but in past poor times I retreated to my parents and sponged off them, so it never seemed so bad. This is the poorest I’ve been on my own. And my basic cost of living is more than it’s ever been before. So there you go. It’s just the universe forcing me to find creative ways to earn extra money. That’s all. It’s just the contract I made with myself before I came here. I knew I’d need forcing, that I wouldn’t go easy. So, here I am. Push has come to shove. I need to do something about it or . . .

Mood: pretty good for a poor white girl
Drinking: coffee, with cream
Listening To: On-Air with Ryan Seacrest
Hair: stringy


My mother came to visit on Saturday. We went out shopping for window treatments at Zellers and then she put up blinds and curtain rods for me. Starting to look like a home around this place! I’m liking it, I’m liking it a lot! I returned to Barnettville with her at the end of the day for some dog visiting and to attend the Third Annual Keenan Oscar Party last night. The coveted Pink Panther was up for grabs once again and I kinda sorta redeemed myself from last year’s dismal showing, tying against the reigning champion, mister dee. So, Pink comes to live with me for half the year, then the mclaughlin’s and then, since next year is surely the year I get to see all the movies before the awards, back to me for a good long visit.

Okay, but seriously, what the hell happened to the Oscars?! Was it not the longest most boring uninspired uneventful broadcast ever? It was tough to stay awake.

This morning I went to Rogers Cable and taped a segment on BnM. We’re going to do another shoot later this week and the piece will air next week. I don’t get cable, so I won’t see it. But that’s okay! I think I’d rather not. I am tired today. Feeling a little spacey. I walked home from Rogers, about 25 minutes, and I’m still falling asleep. Listening to On-Air with Ryan Seacrest to see what he’s saying about the Oscars, but I must’ve tuned in too late, doesn’t seem to be saying much.

Rabbit ears were gifted last night!! Yay! I’m excited to hook them up and see if I can’t get some clear CBC, and maybe even (dare I hope) a little ATV. Should go try that soon.

My train of thought is all over the place. Best not to write now.

Mood: full of holes
Drinking: coffee with cream
Listening To: riding dirty
Hair: styled for tv!

Move Along

Had a great day yesterday down on the Bay! Drove around with a guy getting the tour, getting the names of contacts. But even if I spoke to nobody else, I’ve got enough for a story. That’s always good. Got back around 4:30 or so and went to supper at the Bull & Lyre. Fulvia had burgers on special so I had to try one. The best burger I’ve had in a long while! Tres yummy! They’ll be on special next Friday too, you should go, try them. I think I’ll have to return. Home-made bun, real burger, lettuce, tomatoe, mushrooms, melted cheese, served with a side of chips and coleslaw. Six bucks! Can’t beat that! She also had fish chowder on special, two specials every day, but I’m not much for the seafood. Despite having spent the day in Escuminac.

Johnny Newman is playing the blues at the Bull & Lyre next weekend. Perhaps we’ll have to go. I think that’d be pretty cool. Still haven’t gotten to the new Irish pub in Chatham, O’Donaghue’s. Soon! Must go!

I see that the My Mother’s Kitchen guys from Chatham Head have moved to around the square Newcastle under a different name Bistro 110 or something like that. Where the Pick of the Vine used to be. Be some good eats there for sure. Put that on the list of places to hit some day soon.

Went to the movies last night. Saw “Ghost Rider.” Don’t even ask how THAT happened! 🙂 Needless to say it was hilarious once we realized it was based on a Marvel Comic Book character. You gotta wonder whether all these people were dying to be in this . . . or if they needed to fulfill studio contracts. I suspect the latter. Still, we had a pretty good time. Had worse times. The DaVicni Code comes to mind. This was more fun than that. This one even had some scary jumping moments, and it flowed along quite quickly.

Today my mother might be dropping by. Though right now it is snowing . . . so, maybe she won’t come until tomorrow. We need to see about getting curtain rods, a box spring, etc.

Mood: sore from sleeping the wrong way or arthritis or something
Drinking: king cole tea with skim milk
Listening To: had itunes on earlier but . . .
Hair: getting long again

Where The Watermelon Grow

How much was your hydro bill for last month? A couple of people yesterday told me HUGE and totally SCARY figures. I travelled around the house all day turning the heaters down and unplugging things. It’s a bit frigid here this morning . . . but not unbearable. Hundreds of dollars for a hydro bill would be way more unbearable. Dear Spring, please spring forward soon. Thank you, Hardly Any Hydro Cash. So I’m sitting here, sipping my hot coffee, cradling the cup for warmth, and shivering. But that’s okay! Soon I will have curtains to help keep the cold out and all will be well. It’s only -15 anyway, not that chilly. The sky seems clear in darkness, there is a star out up there. So the sun may rise and provide some warmth in a couple of hours. It is supposed to be sunny with cloudy periods.

Yesterday I ventured forth on foot for the first time since the move. (Time flies when you’re freezing!) I walked out to the Scotiabank and switched all my accounts, shopping at the Pharmasave for some pain meds, then home again. A flying trip, as my mother would say. Pretty much took a solid hour–20 minutes out, 20 minutes back, 10 minutes in. But I think it can be done much more quickly once I get used to the treacherous sidewalks (is the concept of walking so foreign?) and if I’m not stuck behind hyper Rottweiler. I didn’t want to get too close to the dog and its owner, because although he may just have been friendly and glad to be out and about . . . he was attacking the cars in the street as they went past. And the walker didn’t seem to have too much control over that situation, so why take chances? The breed is my least favourite, since my days in radio when the station manager would bring his “trained to kill” lethal weapon to the station late at night when I worked alone. I’d turn around in the booth and the dog would just be there. “It’s okay, relax, don’t make any sudden moves,” the manager would smirk. Torture. Some kind of workplace harassment. Crazy way to get his kicks. Anyway, other than the dog in the street, yesterday’s walk was great! Exhilarating! And I can see that I am not at all far from French Ford Cove, when I go out and look down the King George Highway. It’s a totally doable trek.

Today, I’m going down the Bay. I’ve no idea where exactly or who I’ll meet. But I should come away with some good stuff from the excursion. A good basis for a story. It’ll be nothing if not interesting.

Up at 5am this morning. Set an alarm for 6, just in case, but no need. Another two mornings and I’ll have a solid two weeks of early risings under my belt. This is exciting! And not even the slightest bit difficult. This is what freaks me out. All of a sudden I’m not tired anymore. I go to bed in the evening whenever I don’t want to be on the computer anymore or when the dvd is over and most times I’m not even sleepy. But I go anyway, because it’s either go or find something else to do and I usually don’t want to find anything else to do that might wake me up further, so I go. And I lie there and think for awhile and then just close my eyes and go to sleep. Maybe this is how it works for the rest of the world. I don’t know. But this is the most unusual thing ever for me. This whole ease of sleeping thing. This whole awake thing. Slipping into dreamland without a fight, without any anxiety . . . I never knew this existed. And yes, I’m still dreaming a kazillion dreams every night. And now I’m waking up even more frequently throughout the night and checking the clock. But yet, I’m the most rested I’ve ever been, the least stressed over sleep (and sleep has always kinda caused me some stress). Bizarre. Am I becoming normal? Whatever this is, I love it! I mean seriously love it! No relapses allowed.

And that’s all folks. I’m outta time. Much to do before departing for the bay.

Mood: over the moon
Drinking: the last of the coffee with the last of the cream
Listening To: a drip in the kitchen sink
Hair: still super straight

Gonna Be A Bright Sunshiny Day

Late getting around to blogging this morning. Slept a bit later. No 4:30 wake-up! Slept straight through until 6, but didn’t rise until 7am. The bedroom was warmer last night, I think that’s why I slept so soundly. Plus I’m not feeling a hundred per cent, so I may sleep more the next couple of days.

So yesterday was a little screwy, in that things did not go exactly as planned. But all around it was a great day anyway. My breakfast meeting got cancelled (for an excellent reason and will definitely be rescheduled). My brother-in-law ended up with two job interviews instead of one and both went very well. The cover story guy called me back and agreed to do the story, we’re meeting next week. I didn’t get out to the bank before it’s 3pm closing to take care of that business. Today is the day! I’m clear sailing until this afternoon when I now have to participate in the Bowl for Kids because my sister/co-worker cannot. My Baie excursion has been postponed until tomorrow.

Mom got me living room curtains, a mat, and a boot tray. She also sent some lead-in for the tv. Last night I got to watch a very snowy looping Coronation Street. Well, I could hear it anyway . . . most of the time. Adding rabbit ears to the ever growing list tacked to my refrigerator of things I will get when my ship comes in. I am right by the water, I expect if there’s a ship to be found, I’ll see it coming. Mom’s going to come down on Saturday or Sunday and we’ll go buy curtain rods, hang curtains, hang the swag lamp, etc. Then I’ll go to Barnettville with her and visit my poochie, attend the annual Keenan Oscar bash, etc. Of course, Nick doesn’t even miss me. He is content to grow old with Grammie.

Anxiety in my belly. I’m squashing it. Trying to squash it. It’s not real. It doesn’t matter. The only thing that matters is the sunshine and the beauty of the day. That’s all that’s real.

Mood: trying
Drinking: coffee, cream
Listening To: coffee pot gurgle, footsteps overhead
Hair: very straight for some odd reason


Minus 11 at 6am, no wind chill. No wind chill?! YAY!! Today I go outside! Awake since 4:30 again this morning, though I didn’t get up until after 5. I like to lay and think and look at the lights out the window. My old apartment was so dark, so windowless, this is a treat.
This morning I am meeting a friend for late breakfast. Before I go there I have to go to the bank and take care of some business, transferring accounts, etc. After breakfast I have to hurry home so I’ll be here when my brother-in-law arrives with the laundered pants I sent to Barnettville the other day, before Grandad whispered the key to the coin operated washing machine into my almost dreaming ear. He’s coming here after his first job interview in 11 years. Eleven freaking years!! These things blow my mind. The only thing I’ve done that long is write. Period. That is all. Longevity is something to pursue in my old age, I think. Anyway, as you may or may not know, my brother-in-law has been unemployed since about the middle of last week when the mill closed. The job interview today is right up his alley in automobile parts for a dealership (why do we have so many car dealerships anyway?) and I know he’s perfect for the position, but his family needs medical benefits and nobody was quite sure how much the position pays . . . so hopefully if we all focus on getting them exactly what they need, it’ll all work out.

I am supposed to be going on a road trip tomorrow for BnM with my boss. The featured community in the next issue is going to be Baie Ste. Anne/ Escuminac area. I’ve driven through but never properly visited, so we’re going on a tourist-like excursion so I can get a feel for the culture there. Apparently it’s a bit different this far up the river, more joie de vivre or something. Should be fun. I like doing that kind of thing. Stacy and I always used to go somewhere in summer. Somewhere fairly local, but not properly explored. One summer we did Boiestown/Doaktown area. Another we went down to Tabusintac. One day we went to Rogersville, but that was only to eat at a restaurant people were raving about, not to launch a full-on tourist excursion. The Miramichi region is huge and every small community within is unique. I’m lucky because it’s my job to explore and report back to others. Otherwise I might miss out myself.

Yesterday I did the initial interview for the featured business in the April issue. February was late, due almost entirely to my Sackville melt-down. So this time I’ve got something to prove. I let the crew down and they lost any confidence they had in my abilities. There’s no room for error from here on in. The cover story guy has not agreed to be profiled yet. Today is the cut-off. I’ll call him tonight, see if he’s in or out, and then proceed or move on to Plan B, depending. I’m hoping he’s in, but I have a feeling he’s out. Either way is okay. Plan B is also a good story.

I adjusted my 101 list yesterday. Needed to make it more relevant to Miramichi living, take out the Sackville stuff. As I was coming up with the few replacement things I came up with a whole bunch of new ideas. I wanted to revamp the whole thing, take out any that maybe I just put in as an afterthought to finish the list and didn’t feel that strongly about. But then I stopped myself. Save some stuff for the next list. And if I do them in the meantime without a list, oh well, all the better.

The sky’s starting to lighten up. It’s pretty cloudy though, not anticipating a visible sunrise this morning. There’s a sun in the forecast though. I should see it today at any rate. I could use a day of sunshine to warm up my place. Though this morning is much warmer than last evening all ready. This is good. I need to get used to functioning in these temperatures. Sackville was different. The one good thing about the cold is that my arthritis generally stays in check. I’ve got a wrist thing going on still, carried over from last week, but I’m starting to think it’s not arthritis related but some sort of injury I don’t remember getting.

Nearly dawn, time to hustle and officially begin the day.

Mood: pretty darn good
Drinking: coffee with cream
Listening To: nothing, absolutely nothing
Hair: needs dye . . . no funding for such an art project 😦